Parent’s role in child psychology
A seed that turns to a beautiful flower has a journey. When nurtured well it blossoms. An appropriate quantity of water, fertilized soil and a temperature areessentials. Meanwhile if the seed donot get a quality soil, a proper depth, water, consistent moisture, warmth, fertilizer, enough light and the air it will not survive.
Children’s are the seeds who need a careful parenting to blossom like a flower. When a child develops with a series of developmental stages from infants to adults, their physical, intellectual, emotional and social aspects are developing together. The inclusion of all the aspects makes them a human.Every guardian/parents were once a child. Our experience, our knowledge both grabbed and obtained helps us foster self and the children we are with. The proper role of the parent is to provide encouragement, support, and access to activities that enable the child to start a journey towards smooth development.
Children are keen observer, they learn from parents, the only teacher throughout their life. When a coach enters a field with the players, the players are exposed to the challenges and are encouraged to experience the process that allows the players to explore on their own and learn. Yes,guardian/ parents are a coach and children are the player in the field. And are liable to coach with age-appropriate challenges to encourage development as well as to experiences that allow the child to explore on their own and learn from interacting with their environment.
Children are simply shaped. In the process of development physically, mental, socially and emotionally parents plays direct and indirect role. Children’s cognitive abilities, beliefs, ethical values, coping defenses, and salient emotional moods at each developmental stage are the result of diverse influences operating in complex ways. Spoon feeding, potty training are need in first 3 years of development whereas cleaning those is to be coached from 4years old. Parental conversations with the child, and especially naming unfamiliar objects, topics affect the child’s future understanding and behavioral pattern. When we build a house, support to the structure is given and gradually taken down when it’s all sated and able to stand on its own, a parent must also be a support to a child to allow them to explore and learn, move towards productivity and see their safety.
“Once a child saw a glass of juice in his father’s hand and asked can I have it? His father replied- no it’s for adult.
Child said “i will have it when I’m adult?”
A mother to her child said, “eat your food else you are not getting your toys.”
Child replied: “I will do things as per you and you must obey me too.”
From birth children are goal-directed to experiment and learn from each experience.It’s not give and take relation. Know how to respond. It’s very crucial part of development. We not just feed them food , we feed them words of wisdom, behavior, knowledge and emotion and we often do a blunder here. As a guardian/ parents exchanging emotional dialog, spending a quality time, having meaning oriented dialog, scaffolding, following a child’s lead and most important seeing child as a person is must. The mentioned factors are to help maintain a cordial relationship with child and in child’s mental health. It helps in their self-esteem, confidence level, loving and caring nature which keeps them associated with self and society.
‘’I am likely to live what you believe in
Teach me how to think, not what to think
Give me the legacy of character and faith
I can build empire on my own
Never forget I’m someone today
I will be me with your interplay.
Yes you teach me about life
I teach you what it is all about.’’
Counselor/Psychologist: Anisha Aryal
SOS Children Village Nepal